Treating my phone addiction to soothe my anger baby

We can all be angry sometimes, especially if our life is slipping away into an endless void of phone pixels and doom scrolling

Hi Friends

How are you?

My neighbor spotted a coyote napping in our backyard

Seeing this guy layed out in the sun was truly one of the highlights of my week, although it is bad news for Api who is accustomed to exploring the patch of forest behind my house. I’ve been keeping him inside, and he is starting to grow impatient with me!

api sulking in a pile of pillows and stuffed animals as I hold him captive for his own safety!!!

I am sitting with the continued violence towards Palestine and reflecting on powerlessness.

Motaz said you cannot call yourself free if you cannot stop a genocide

I have been sitting with these words, letting them unfold, and I feel the deep resonance.

While many of us many think we are free, ultimately we are all at the whim of the people who maintain strong control over most of our natural resources. If you peel back the branding and follow the money , it becomes apparent that we are being fed products by a mega corporation that is slowly draining us of money and energy.

What if we lived in a world that was not governed by money, but ethics and values, where a unanimous vote to call for an end to violence would be honored.

People have stopped traffic, stopped shipments of weapons, flooded local and national government with calls to stop the violence, signed petitions, among many other actions, and yet the violence continues.

We absolutely need to keep calling, protesting, petitioning, and it is also clear to me that my role in ending the violence also has to target the systemic causes of this violence. I don’t have the whole answer, but I know that growing my own food, divesting from consumerism, and building authentic bonds with people around me are all part of the bigger solution, although they are frustrating slow.

If there was a like a magic button in the middle of a volcano (like in the movies) that I could push to end genocide, violence, and poverty, I would devote my life to pushing that button.

But life is more circular, less direct. I remember when I was first made aware of systemic oppression, and the burning anger I felt. I remember my powerful professor, Alison Piepmeir (Rest in Power), said

“Oppression is not a conspiracy theory. There’s not one person orchestrating the whole thing,”

Her words were a gentle invitation to me to think bigger, to see the whole picture, to think critically about how power is maintained.

I invite us to continue to reflect and to continue to take action, to claim our power and take the baby steps to move out of control and into autonomy

I strive for autonomy but we all know who controls me….

In related news, I am taking steps to combat my phone addiction

I really became addicted to my phone when I visited India in 2022. When I returned home to America, I was living in South Carolina and extremely isolated. While I knew my addiction was not healthy or in line with the life I wanted to live, I was also just trying to get through each day. It was not the optimal time to try and break the addiction, although I did use some harm reduction measures.

Last night, I deleted some of my phone games , and I downloaded an app called OPAL

I haven’t paid for the pro version and I don’t know if I will use this app long term, but just having an app on my phone that tracks my pick ups and locks me out of distracting phone apps is life changing.

I didn’t realize how much of my life I was handing over through procrastination behaviors.

according to Opal

If my phone usage continues I will spend 42 years of my life looking at my phone.

Truly haunting!!!

Making change often isn’t easy, I think, because we turn towards shame and fear when we need to turn towards compassion to break the cycles of our behavior. Ultimately, I’m glad I’m taking steps for a life of deeper presence and connection.

Not because presence and connection are like the best things ever, but because that is what I value and that is what I want in my life.

Recently I’ve been having lots of moments of anger, and when I take time to sit with my anger, what comes forward is feelings of loneliness and disconnection. I know that tending to my phone addiction is a baby step to creating the conditions for connection in my life and release some of this anger

A representation of the Angry baby that lives within me

If you are looking for support in approaching a change in your life, or mothering your own anger baby, get on my calendar and let’s connect!

I have lots of exciting things coming in the new year!!

so much to share with you all, but for now I really want to get your opinion on something.

I’m working on a little e-book on boundaries and I would love your insight

If there is something else that you want to know about boundaries, let me know!! I really want to make sure I create something useful and relevant.

This e-book will be FREE for my subscribers!! Big thank you to everyone who has and continues to support.

let’s be linkedin friends!!

Like many people, I’m on the internet because I have to be for work and also see above paragraph on phone addiction. This year, I ‘ve decided to do the majority of workplace interneting on LinkedIn!!

I post on LinkedIn 2-3 times a week, so if you are wishing to read more posts by me, its the place to find me!!

I will have more news and updates in newsletters to come so keep an eye on your inbox!!!

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LOVE U THANK U FOR READING <3

XOXOXOXOXOXO TALK TO U NEXT WEEK