Rest and Digest

How a new moon meteor shower helped me confront my true nature

Hello Beloved Friends

I was recently blessed to spend some time in the desert. There is something about a vast open landscape and giant rocks that I find incredibly soothing. If you read my last newsletter, you know I need some soothing these days

Thank you to all the kind messages of support! Many of you sent me monetary support, which I really appreciate. If you feel moved to support my journey, it is always appreciated.

I am opening my books for individual and organizational clients. If you need your tarot cards read, someone to listen deeply and offer reflection, a project manager, a conflict navigator, a de-escalation training, or a speaker, hit me up and let’s dream.

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I also have a podcast called Earthworm Slumber Party. you can listen wherever you find podcasts (apple music, spotify,etc) and we have a youtube. We just released the last episode for season 2.

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Anyways, I was in the desert for a meteor shower. Many of us find solace in astrology, and my beloved teacher always reminds me that astrology comes from the desert, because in the desert you can see the vast open sky.

The desert is inherently revealing.

As the wind whips, it strips away moisture, causing flesh to crumble, exposing underlying structures.

A withered cholla cactus that has lost her spikes

I went to the desert naively excited for a meteor shower and I left the desert reckoning with the consequences of my nature.

my nature isn’t good or bad, it just is.

please appreciate my hello kitty socks

The desert offered me a neutral reflection

On my last night, I spent a long time in the bathroom of my air bnb. I sang Mariah Carey’s “Obsessed” to my reflection and found solace in my deep sense of self love and adoration.

I realized that I am obsessed with me, which is good because everywhere I go there I am.

loving myself in this world is not always easy

I am very lovable, so sometimes it is extremely easy.

it is also a conscious, continuous choice/act/practice.

it is resistance

it is political.

It is made possible by my commitment to non-judgement and the culmination of time I have devoted to cultivating a kind and loving inner voice. Our efforts to be kind to ourselves, big and small, add up over time, and matter profusely.

I notice that the kinder my inner voice is, the easier self accountability is.

Accountability is like the sun, in its presence without protection we can wither away, but if we engage with care and safety it’s heat can pull us towards extraordinary growth.

Below the paywall I am going to dive into some self accountability and share about my personal expierences with substance use and addiction.

I want to mention it above the paywall because addiction is a word that carries a heavy stigma, even though the majority of us engage with addiction as a way to cope with life.

In these times when we are surrounded by violence and oppression, it is more important than ever that we resist escapism and addiction and that we find a way to be present with ourselves, our world, and each other.

Sometimes I get overwhelmed because I feel I must take action and I often feel the weight of the world on my shoulders, but I often try and remind myself that the first step is presence. Presence with myself, presence with the earth and my surroundings, presence with my community.

I never have to take action alone, it is in fact better when we decide upon and take action together.

Just two thai barbies dancing through the desert

Thank you for reading!!! TTYL LOVE U

Below is a lil sneak peek of what the paid subscribers see at the end of these emails…

hi cuties!!!

thank you so much for being a paid subscriber and supporting my work! I really appreciate you for making my survival possible <3

lets talk about substance use

As an herbalist, I am acutely aware of the overlap between medicine and poison.

Food is medicine, and no one can tell me that a spicy chicken sandwhich from chick-fil-a is not drugs.

Instagram, television, sugar, coffee— all things we can use to experience and embrace life, and we can also use in service of self-harm or escapism.