4 ways to soothe fear
we have to tend to our hearts and minds if we are going to resist oppression over time!!
Hello Beloved Friends
Let’s take 3 breaths together?
Welcome new subscribers!
My name is Opulence and I am a healing professional, transformative facilitator, and speaker! Thank you for subscribing to my substack!
As many of you know, I am an intersex person of color who grew up in the Carolina’s. All that to say, I’m no stranger to fear. In my expierence, avoiding or resisting my fear is often my most immediate response, but it tends to create conditions for my fear to rule my life.
To truly soothe my fear, I’ve learned that I need to approach it with love, acceptance, and compassion; while simultaneously holding some crucial boundaries with my fear. While I honor this emotion, I also honor its limits. I know that I do not want fear to drive my decision making.
Below are some of my favorite strategies for soothing fear!!!
I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again: breath is magical
sometimes I do a little one two punch, and pair my deep breathing with self-holding.
I always feel so much better after. I like to take 2-3 breaths in each position, and then at the end I choose the position I enjoyed the most and take five breaths in that pose.
I created a little guided video doing all the poses, so if you need some extra encouragement to try it, check out my video below:
one easy and free way to support me is to subscribe to my youtube channel and to share it with your homies!
Reading is magical
Reading builds our capacity to stay regulated even while uncomfortable. Below is an excerpt from a poem that my very wise friend Mai is memorizing.
The poem is “Kindness” by Naomi Shihab Nye
I feel intimidated by attempting to memorize a poem, but witnessing Mai do it with consistency is energizing and helping it feel more possible for me!!
MUSIC IS MAGIC
My best friend, Paradise, makes music to alchemize their emotions.
I spent the night of the election on their floor eating the most delicious chicken enchiladas and watching them sing their feelings into a mic.
It was a stark contrast to 2016, when I spent the evening of election night in a target where someone stole my debit card and my favorite sweater.
While the trump presidency feels like a weird spiral, I was pleasantly surprised to feel so grounded and nourished this time around. Eating good food and watching my bestie sing, I felt grounded in our collective power and mutual care
You can expierence the same magic as me and check out my bestie’s music project, Bird of Paradigm
Presence is magic
One of my favorite tools for coping with anxiety, fear, and dread related to the future is presence.
There is value in thinking about the future and taking steps to prepare for future outcomes/consequences. However, preparation can veer into obsession and we can actually be doing more harm then good.
It can be easy to fall into hoarding behaviors in anticipation for what is to come, but often we end up wasting resources stockpiling things we don’t really need, and are drained energetically and physically when the crisis does happen.
In my opinion,
The antidote to hoarding and future obsession is self trust and presence.
I often tell myself
The best thing I can do is be present and trust that me and my community will figure out the solution to whatever comes up together.
This affirmation allows me to stay in the present without getting sidetracked or overwhelmed by imaginary scenarios.
My homies, as I begin to write the newsletter again, I’ve decided to have a paid section at the end of each newsletter!
I do this partially to create a space where I can share vulnerably about my life and also have some control over who sees it.
the lowest substack will let me charge is $5/monthly or $30/annually. I already changed these prices on the back end, so if you are currently subscribed you should see a reduction in your subscription cost.
I want to know what you are interested in reading about !!
THANK U FOR READING
take care of yourself, beloved reader
Everyone wants the chisme, as they should!!!!
🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻